![]() ![]() Then, as Arabella starts to recall her assault, Terry instructed Simon to lie and say he walked her home. In the most recent installment, Arabella learns what viewers have known for weeks: that Terry told their friend Simon it was OK to leave Arabella alone at the bar on the night she survived a drug-facilitated rape. But in the tenth episode of the series, the test is finally between them. Like clockwork, they find support in the refrain of each other. Didn’t we all make up secret handshakes we no longer remember with intimate friends we now only glimpse on Instagram? “Your birth is my birth, your death is my death” is a stirring credo, especially between adult women, but might it also be accidentally vacuous - at worst, a poetic hyperbole and, at best, plain naive? Since the season premiere, Bella and Terry have been tested by sexual deceptions, professional defeats, and cash flow problems. ![]() The words are also, as a viewer, hard to fully invest in. Between them, there’s no such thing as being alone. For two women with loose family attachments and professional lives drifting from gig to gig against the background of a mammoth city that runs on their energy but offers them little in return, they are a pledge of allegiance: The smallest unit of their existence is the dyad. Occasionally, the words serve the purposes of a mantra, a centering shorthand for the respite of intertwined fates. At Terry’s birthday party, Arabella uses them to wind up her toast, a celebratory cry into the year ahead. They’re a private call and response, an adult iteration of the secret handshake that sometimes feels just as performative. “Your birth is my birth, your death is my death.” I May Destroy You’s Arabella and Terry have been trading these ten words back and forth all season.
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